Unhealthy habits?
Question
I've been having some problems with food for a while now. I know I'm underweight and I eat very little. I very rarely eat more than 1,000 calories a day, and I do lots of exercise too. If I eat over about 600 calories I make myself sick. I'm worried I'm going to get fat, because I used to weigh over ten stone and I'm really quite short.
I like sweet foods and sometimes I'll eat a lot in one go and then make myself sick because I'm scared that I'll get fat again. I can't talk to my parents about it and my school is trying to make me have some counselling or even go to the doctor about it. I'm just not ready to do that yet. Please help; I don't know what to do.
Answer
You're obviously finding things difficult at the moment. But it's good to hear you've acknowledged the problems you're having with food and you've taken a brave step in contacting us. The habits you've described, together with being underweight and exercising a lot daily, sound worrying and it is understandable you, and your school, are concerned about it. It must be frustrating to know that you might need some help but not feeling ready to see a doctor or counsellor just yet.
Unhealthy relationships with food can begin when food is used to cope with difficult feelings, such as boredom, anxiety, anger, loneliness, shame or sadness. There is also general pressure from the media and society to look 'thin'. Some people use food to ease painful situations or feelings, or to relieve stress, perhaps without even realising it. When food begins to rule a person's life, whether in the form of compulsive eating, binge eating, or excessive dieting, a person's relationship with food can become dangerously unstable and this can develop into an eating disorder.
Overcoming eating disorders usually needs more organised help from a clinic or therapist. And although you don't feel ready yet it will be useful for you to visit your local doctor (GP). They will be able to explore the options of treatment available to you and refer you onto more specialist services.
Although talking to friends and family can be difficult, if there is someone you trust to confide in, talking to them might help you to make a start on understanding your needs. It may also give them a better insight into your situation, so they can offer you more effective support and understanding.
If you would like to talk to someone else first you might like to contact the Eating Disorders Association (EDA) on 0845 634 7650. You can talk to them about what's worrying you and they can help you find appropriate help and support. They also have a message board; eating disorders affect many people and it's important to know you're not alone and that it is possible to overcome the condition, sometimes it helps to talk to others who share a similar experience. If you would like to talk to someone about weight and self-image issues you can also call SupportLine on 020 8554 9004, they can provide you with confidential emotional support about anything that's worrying you.
When you feel ready, a talking therapy such as counselling might help you further. A trained counsellor or therapist will be able to assist you in identifying any underlying issues that could be contributing to your situation. These may include elements of control, low self-esteem, depression, family, or relationship problems. It can be a difficult step to take but if you can contact EDA, or your GP, they will be able to provide you with further details of local services.
Updated: 13/01/2009
Question answered by SANE
