Paternity problem

My girlfriend is having my baby, but we're not married. A friend told me I have no rights to my child, this can't be true, can it?

I'm worried I won't have any rights in regards to my baby should we split up. Can you tell me what rights I have, if any?

As the father of a child you will have a duty to maintain the child until they leave school by paying a proportion of you income. This can be done inside the relationship or, if it breaks up, either through agreement with the child's mother or through the Child Support Agency. This is your responsibility even though you weren't in a long-term relationship with the mother when the child was conceived.

If you are not married to the mother of your child, you wouldn't have automatic parental responsibility even if you are living with the child's mother. You can get equal parental responsibility if:

• you register the child's birth jointly with the child's mother, or
• you have made a parental responsibility agreement with the mother, or
• you have acquired parental responsibility order from a court, or
• you are appointed as guardian, or
• you marry the child's mother.

Legally, parental responsibility goes on until the child reaches 18 but as the child gets older so the law assumes that the child is more capable of making its own decisions.

As a parent (with parental responsibility) the Children Act 1989 says your responsibilities are 'all the rights, duties, powers, responsibilities and authority which by law a parent of a child has in relation to the child and his property'. This includes:

• Safeguarding and promoting a child's health, development and welfare
• Financially supporting the child
• Providing direction and guidance to the child
• Maintaining direct and regular contact with the child
• Acting as a legal representative until the child is 16 if required
• Ensuring that the child is suitably educated

In order to fulfil these responsibilities there are certain rights that can be used by the patent. These can include:

• Having the child living with the person with responsibility or having a say in where the child lives
• Controlling, directing and guiding the child's upbringing
• If the child is not living with her/him, having a personal relationship and regular contact with the child
• Acting as a legal representative until the child is 16 if required
• Choosing the child's name, but there may be restrictions on changing a child's name
• Choosing the child's education
• Being the person to give consent for medical treatment, issuing passports, adoption and marriage for a child under 18
• Choosing a guardian for the child
• Making decisions about the child's property on the child's behalf and for her/his benefit.

As you can, assuming parental responsibility can involve a great deal.

You also asked about the child having your name. In short, the child doesn't have to take your name, indeed the mother can call the child what she likes even if you go with her and register the birth together and you are on the birth certificate. This would be the case even if you were married.

Once a surname has been registered on the birth certificate it is very, very difficult to get that name changed. You may want to consider discussing this aspect with the mother of your child before she gives birth so you can come to an agreement well before you need to register the birth.

Updated: 08/02/2007

Question answered by CAB